Posts Tagged ‘marriage’


I got such a great response from my last blog about cheating and the increasing percent of women cheaters, I thought to myself I want to continue this discussion.It turns out that there are actually websites devised with the sole interest of meeting, hooking up and covering up individuals who are looking for an affair or a fling outside their current relationship. I wanted to know more about this industry and exactly how their business works.

Ashley Madison a site that has expanded its brand of discretionary avocations across the globe. While the site has 70% male visitors the rate of women is increasing according to CEO Noel Biderman. In an article of GQ a few women are interviewed to understand why they are looking outside their marriages or relationships to find something new and in particular why are they using Ashley Madison to do it. They are called “Lady Don Drapers” in the article. The first woman Megan who has worked for one the highest political figures this generation admits to having an affair with not one, but two men per year and some women here and there. Megan refers to herself as “I’m a dirty old man in a woman’s body.” Her preference is young men in particularly “eye candy”. Megan calls her husband “super-vanilla” and says they have a happy household and he’s great with the kids. So what am I missing here?

Another woman Gloria praises Ashley Madison for finding her way to publishers of magazines, CEO’s, politicians, and managing partners at law firms and investment firms. Gloria says love still holds the marriage together, even though she admits that she doesn’t believe one person will fulfill her needs. She says even if she divorced her husband and married someone else it would only be a matter of time before she would lose interest physically. Gloria admits that she loves her husband, but she not willing to give up her strong sexual urges.

The company is getting some unexpected,but equally welcomed business from recent political scandals. Noel Biderman notes that says the once largely taboo topic is making more and more headway into the mainstream. “Tide is starting to turn” notes Biderman. “As the Spitzers and Weiners come back onto the stage,” so he hopes investors from “Wall Street and Canada’s Bay Street will look at this business as something they want to fund.” Biderman shares with Bloomberg magazine that his family and friends funded the website initially and within six months he was able to return the investment of 1 million dollars.

Ashley Madison is now the third largest paid dating site in the world with members in over 26 countries and 90 million dollars in revenue for 2012. With over 20 million members the company is setting it’s eyes on infidelity in Asia. In June the marketed in Japan and were able to snag over half a million people in just three months. “It was our most successful launch ever,” says the CEO. They since launched in Hong Kong its 29th market which has 80,000 members. “There is an unfaithful, sexual revolution,”…….Usually Asian culture is seen as being more conservative, but Biderman uses the argument that infidelity is in our DNA.

Biderman defends the website, making the point that he doesn’t force people to cheat. He provides the platform for those individuals who have already made up their minds to step out on their spouse. Out of the 160,000 women on the Japanese site 68% of them are married women. A lot of them are the ones who stay at home while their husbands go to brothels and massage parlors which are legal in Japan. Biderman has noticed that the percentages of unfaithful women does vary region to region. Typically Latin American women have lower female adultery rates when compared to North American and European women.

18% of single men signed onto the Hong Kong website where generally only 9 – 11% would sign up. The company expects to expand to 10 – 11 more markets in Asia before 2014. With no marketing Ashley Madison had over 325,000 trying to sign on in mainland China. While the company has had a fair amount of advertisements on radio, tv and social media. Some stations are not willing to partner with the company still. Facebook refuses to air any ads from the company and Fox and NBC wouldn’t air any commercials during the superbowl for the company. Biderman is still optimistic for the company’s future. Biderman believes infidelity can save marriages, Dr Sandy a lecturer at the department of Sociology at the University of Hong Kong says that infidelity may not destruct a marriage depending on the couples outlook on the institution of marriage.

Considering that there are couples who cannot find there sexually or emotionally significant other within the structure of their marriage they may find comfort and satisfaction with someone else. Dr Sandy makes the point, that when couples can’t agree and have deceived the other party in the relationship that is when the problems occur. Another opinion shows the popularity of the company and the website a sign of the times. The sign that people are becoming more self-centered individualistic and less likely to sacrifice for marriage and family when it comes to self-fulfillment. Biderman sees himself side by side with other industries that profit off of infidelity like hotels, jewelry stores, pornography, strip clubs, and massage parlors.

What do you think? Is he just filling a void with his company? or is Ashley Madison becoming more of an enticement to make it easier for those to cheat?  Let me know what you think?

Gay marriage New Jersey: Cindy Meneghin, second from right, hugs her attorney Hayley Gorenberg during a rally on Sept. 27, 2013, at Garden State Equality in Montclair, N.J., hours after a Superior Court judge ruled that New Jersey is unconstitutionally denying federal benefits to gay couples and must allow them to marry.AP Photo: Julio Cortez

Cindy Meneghin, second from right, hugs her attorney Hayley Gorenberg during a rally on Sept. 27, 2013, at Garden State Equality in Montclair, N.J., hours after a Superior Court judge ruled that New Jersey is unconstitutionally denying federal benefits to gay couples and must allow them to marry.
AP6 hr ago  By Geoff Mulvihill of Associated Press







New Jersey’s Supreme Court ruled unanimously to uphold a lower-court order that gay weddings must start Monday. Gov. Chris Christie had sought a delay.

Same-sex marriages can begin within days in New Jersey after the state’s highest court ruled unanimously Friday to uphold an order that they must start Monday and to deny a delay that had been sought by Gov. Chris Christie’s administration.

The ruling puts New Jersey on the cusp of becoming the 14th state — and the third most populous among them — to allow same-sex marriage. As of Monday, one-third of Americans will live in a place where gay marriage is legal.

“The state has advanced a number of arguments, but none of them overcome this reality: Same-sex couples who cannot marry are not treated equally under the law today,” the court said in an opinion by Chief Justice Stuart Rabner. “The harm to them is real, not abstract or speculative.”

Related: U.S. Supreme Court kills DOMA, opens path to gay marriage in Calif.

A judge on a lower court had ruled last month that New Jersey must recognize same-sex marriage and set Monday as the date to allow weddings. Christie, a Republican who is considered a possible 2016 presidential candidate, appealed the decision and asked for the start date to be put on hold while the state appeals.

A spokesman for Christie said that he will comply with the ruling, though he doesn’t like it.

“While the governor firmly believes that this determination should be made by all the people of the State of New Jersey, he has instructed the Department of Health to cooperate with all municipalities in effectuating the order,” spokesman Michael Drewniak said in a statement.

Same-sex marriage is being debated elsewhere. Oregon has begun recognizing same-sex weddings performed out of state, and it is likely that voters will get a chance next year to repeal the state’s constitutional ban on gay marriage. The Hawaii Legislature also soon could take up a bill to legalize same-sex unions, while a similar measure has passed the Illinois Senate but not the House. Lawsuits challenging gay marriage bans also are pending in several states, including Michigan, Pennsylvania and Virginia.

New Jersey’s top court agreed last week to take up the appeal of the lower-court ruling. Oral arguments are expected Jan. 6 or 7.

In Friday’s opinion, Rabner wrote that the state has not shown that it is likely to prevail in the case, though it did present some reasons not to move forward now.

“But when a party presents a clear case of unequal treatment, and asks the court to vindicate constitutionally protected rights, a court may not sidestep its obligation to rule for an indefinite amount of time,” he wrote. “Under these circumstances, courts do not have the option to defer.”

Rabner also rejected the state’s argument that it was in the public interest not to allow marriages until the court has had more time to rule fully on the issue.

Related: County clerks on front lines of gay marriage battle

“We can find no public interest in depriving a group of New Jersey residents of their constitutional right to equal protection while the appeals process unfolds,” he wrote.

For those opposed to gay marriage, denying the request to delay was troubling.

“In what universe does it make sense to let the question at hand be answered before it’s asked or argued?” Len Deo, president of the New Jersey Family Policy Council, said in a letter Friday to members.

On Thursday, some communities started accepting applications for marriage licenses from same-sex couples so that they would pass the 72-hour waiting period by 12:01 a.m. Monday.

Several communities, including Asbury Park, Lambertville and Newark — where Cory Booker, who was elected Wednesday to the U.S. Senate, is mayor — are holding ceremonies for multiple couples then.

“It’s a great day to be gay in New Jersey,” said Amy Quinn, a member of the city council in Asbury Park who is planning to marry Heather Jensen, her partner of 10 years, on Monday.

At a rally Friday night in Montclair, about 150 people gathered, cheering and holding signs reading “Support love.” Some opened bottles of champagne.

Among the couples at the rally were David Gibson and Rich Kiamco of Jersey City, who had their marriage license in hand so they could get married Monday. The couple previously got married in New York but wants to get married where they live, they said.

The court did not address the question of what would happen to the status of same-sex marriages entered into next week if it later decides that the state does not have to grant the marriages.

Whether gay couples should have the right to marry in New Jersey has been the subject of a battle in the state’s courts and Legislature for a decade. There has been a flurry of movements in both venues since June, when the U.S. Supreme Court invalidated key parts of a federal law that prevented the federal government from recognizing same-sex unions.

Since then, gay rights advocates have asked New Jersey judges to force the state to recognize same-sex marriage, arguing that the current policy of civil unions but not marriage licenses amounts to denying them federal protections such as Social Security survivor benefits and the right to file tax returns jointly.

Since July, gay rights groups have also engaged in an intense campaign aimed at persuading lawmakers to override Christie’s 2012 veto of a bill that would have allowed gay marriage. To get an override, the Legislature must act by Jan. 14.

Sheila Oliver, speaker of the state Assembly, issued a statement blaming Christie for not having gay marriage sooner in New Jersey.

“It’s a shame it took this long to get to this point and that it took a court fight for same-sex couples to gain equal rights,” she said. “New Jersey could have had marriage equality already if it wasn’t for Gov. Christie, who has done everything he could to prevent this from happening, including wasting money and time continuing this court battle.”

Original Post-